Five things I have actually heard people say in dive bars & pubs

1. “Is your fry batter fat free?”
2. “This weed is so cheap it actually made me shart.”
3. “HOW MUCH DO YOU GET PAID!?”
4. “I’ve heard of unisex, but I’ve never had it.”
5. “There is no way you blew Wes Anderson!”

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I am My Mind and One are Three

I am my mind,

One are three,

Sense is none,

Our Dreams are real,

Our talks are waste,

Our vaudeville is dead,

Our wives are prudes,

Our Husbands are daughters,

Our Sons are whores,

Our pages are dead,

and everything

is a satire upon

a joke upon

Irony.

HA!

3/27/12