The Ponderings of Memories Clenched 

To wit and be not known

and strength.

See to wit,

and matter disproportioned,

in ever lasting concept.

What times do we live in,

when our young read stories of their no future.

What now done for our children,

what now done

in dialogue for truth and politic.

Another build up of hope,

or just more foreplay?

There is never a hero in a necktie,

remember that.

But we still need a horse to pull the chariot

that we call country.

The post modern game of thrones,

and it is still the people who pay the price.



The Good Thing About Trump’s Candidacy.  No Seriously…

Okay, now before I say anything else I want to stress the fact that this is NOT an endoresment.  I despise Donald Trump, I have ever since I was 12 and The Apprentice first aired.  I swear to god this is true, I got teased by my classmates for not watching the show or liking Trump, and I will always harbor a little bit of resentment to him for that fact.  Why were a bunch of 12 year olds watching that show? How the hell should I know, but that is the honest truth of how my hatred of Donald Trump started.  

Also I would like to add that the idea of him in the White House fills me with both rage and terror.  No one who ever had a reality show should be a legitimate presidential candidate, congress maybe, but the presidency!?

That being said, here is the good thing about his candidacy, because of his blatant unashamed hypocricy, racism, sexism, and flaunting of his ego and wealth, we are now forced to acknowledge the true detrimental aspects of American culture which is something that both ends of the spectrum, liberal and conservative, have swept under the rug for far too long.

For years we have heard the same arguments, “we dont need feminism anymore because women are now equals.” “Racism doesnt exist anymore.” “All rich people worked hard for what they have.” These have been ultimate lies that we have been buying as truth for far too long, because we as a society are effort minimizers and euphoria maximizers, therefore we did not want to actually acknowledge the fact that racism, sexism, and classism are still toxic aspects of our culture.  The more Trump revels in his and other people’s ignorance the more this reality will be forced into the public eye, which means we can finally begin a legitimate dialogue addressing these issues, instead of just ignoring them to keep our lives complacent and stagnant.

Now, I’m sure eventually Trump will fall.  How, I don’t know, but the fact that more people are coming out of the woodwork as both adamently against his remarks or adamently in favor of his remarks is important because the truth is Trump’s candidacy is a living embodiment of everything wrong with America that we have refused to talk about.  It is however just bizarre that it took a pompous poorly literate meglomaniac with a bad haircut and a crappy now de-funked reality show to get us to talk about them.  Yeah, again, NOT an endorsement.

The old song, and expression

The old song,

The way we get by,

old lost memories,

riffs of old stagnent references,

a present support group

effcient disfunction,

there is no universal truth to these words,

but yours,

therefore there is.

Therefore there is,

there is a soul to all,

there is unity and connection to all,

and that is where love is born.


Forbaren Soul and Love not Lost, but Changed.

Forbaren soul,

lost again insight unseen,

yet not,

merely changed,


The stars tell me nothing but my date of birth,

and the direction slaves did walk.

Soiled old souls,

now bitter, with hate, forgotten of the parental struggle.

The trial of every generation

are the lessons learned from each one’s prior.

A balance of failures and victories,

and always, it is the people who die.

Ah yes, the old return,

the repeated theme and cliche,

it is her beauty,

and I am her folly,

her wanton regret and trial of choice.

Yet I do not concede my love,

I merely forfeit to change, 

for I love her,

I will forfeit to change.


Why I hate Hilary Clinton but would still vote for her, and yes hate is a strong word, that’s why I used it.  

Hilary Clinton used to sit on the board of directors for Walmart, she was silent on all issues involving LGBTQ rights until recent years, she was sec of state & a senator both for only one term while Sanders has been a mayor, a congressman, and a senator. The only thing I remotely agree with her on is gun control & equality for women, but tbh, fuck the Clintons. Bill is an asshole and Hilary is an opportunist and if we elect her it will be the same as Obama, sure some stuff will kind of change and the culture will shift, but there will still be a lack of necessary corporate legislation. and regulation.

But sadly enough, I will still vote for her if she does defeat Sanders.  As much as I will not be excited about it, we can’t have another republican president, especially when everyone of their candidates is more embarassing than Bush.  The republicans are an international joke of homophobes, willfully ignorant, gun loving racists who will further attack a women’s right to choice.  Compared to Clinton, their evil is vomit inducing, her evil is no worse than the standard political insider evil.

But I do hate them both.

That being said, repeat this mantra with me, SANDERS 2016! SANDERS! SANDERS! SANDERS!

Yes, Josh Duggar is a prick, and I have more important things to worry about ( a rant)

Omg, yes Josh Duggar is a POS & I feel bad for his wife blaming herself, but the more you attack him the more you are distracting from a real dialogue. Talk about the fact he isn’t in jail for molesting his sisters which personifies our rape culture, but don’t waste your time savoring this celebrity tabloid crap. While we are fighting about the Duggars, there are still people being denied marriage licenses despite a supreme court ruling and women in Somalia are getting their genitals mutilated. Okay? think about that for a minute.
Seriously, no one of any respectable merit actually respects or takes the Duggar’s seriously anyway.  The people who do are idiots like Mile Huckabee or Michelle Bachman, two people so deep in denial in the closet they are finding christmas presents.

That being said, I really do feel sorry for his poor wife.

Solidarity is one clusterfuck intersection, or, White Privilege, Transphobia, & N.W.A

I recently saw Straight Outta Compton and LOVED it, personally it has rekindled my love of hip hop and I have been on a 3 day long binge on my favorite songs and albums.  But of course not without some biting of my lower lip.

As a progressive, I do have to be real about the world of gangsta rap, something that I love because it describes the reality of our society in the most brutal of ways.  While my white male privelage does prevent me from ever knowing what it is trully like to live and survive in places like Compton, what I can do is empathize with struggle.  I feel my whole life has been nothing but struggle and my relation to hip hop and rap is derived exactly from that, a hardened expression of the struggle.

However as I said, as a progressive, one cannot listen to things like gangsta rap or NWA without being honest about the matters it deals with that are in fact not at all progressive, or are even anti progressive, such as the antiwomen, the homophobic, or even transphobic lyrics of people like Ice Cube, Snoop Dogg, and Eazy-E.  The recent film has been appraised for telling the truth about the black male struggle of our culture, and in doing so reveals an intense disparity regarding these other issues.

The response and critisism is usually the same, and usually comes from the same people, self identified progressives who say they do support the black experience and struggle in america but then get angry with the whole black community because of the realities presented by groups like NWA, namely mysoginy and homophobia.

I am teacher, I have taught in Compton on several occasions and yes, the sexism, transphobia and homophobia there are so disgustingly rampant that its depressing and my attitutde has always been to be frustrated with the black community despite the fact I support it in so many ways, like reforming our police forces and investing into intercity education, but I would genuinely get angry with my students for purpetuating hateful, negative attitudes of people who are also oppressed by the structure of our society.

But after watching Straight Outta Compton, I realized something, it is pointless and racist to be mad at black people for transphobia or anti gay lyircs or mysoginy because it ignores the realities of what people in places like Compton are actually going through.  Think of it like this, when you are dirt poor and you have to worry about whether or not the police will kill you, and your child, for doing nothing but being a different skin color, you aren’t thinking about anyones sexual liberation or gender equality, you are thinking about survival.  When all you think about is survival you become hard, that is the reality of Straight Outta Compton.  The reason there is not more understanding of issues like these in the ghettos is because the truth is it is a place of privelege to be able to liberate your identity, via gender or sexuality or otherwise, because you dont have to present yourself as hard to the world.  To survive in a place like Compton you have to be hard to some degree.  That doesnt mean you have to pack heat and go around gangbanging, but if you present yourself as anything but hard you make yourself a target, and when you are a target in the hood anything can happen.

Now I am not excusing the attitudes of artists like Cube or Snoop, but I am also not going to ignore the hypocrisy of so called white progressives who blame black communities for perpetuating a lack of understanding when they themselves perpetuate a lack of understanding to the struggles of living in the hood.  Solidarity is a 2 way street, yes more people in the black community should acknowledge that people like Bruce Jenner, Laverne Cox, and the women of their community are just as oppressed.  But those of us outside the black community must understand that when you are worried about police murdering you and protecting what you have, day in and day out, your mind isnt in a place to seek the liberation of others.

That being said, I’m going to bow out, read what Laverne Cox most recently posted on instagram, while blasting NWA, gangsta gangsta is at the top of the list! 😛  (actually, its Fuck the Police)

But remember, we must all be more understanding, and I do mean ALL OF US!